Abbr. Enth.Commence Primary Ignition
I really don’t see any reason to post this today, since the world is obviously going to be ending within a couple hours of the posting.
Not sure what I’m talking about? Check out the LHC Countdown, if you can. The last couple of times I’ve tried to check it I couldn’t get on because the site’s bandwidth was exceeded, so apparently there are a lot of people sitting there watching the slow yet inevitable countdown to doom.
So what can we expect to see from doom-seekers as the days pass by and the world doesn’t explode? Well I, for one, expect to see a shift in claims. When the thing gets turned on all those fear mongering nuts who were convinced that 8/8/2008 would be the end of Earth will start saying
“No, it’s going to take a couple months for them to accelerate a particle up to high enough speeds.”
And once we pass that barrier it will be
“But there’s only a 0.04% chance the particles will hit in the right way.”
And once it’s been online and crashing particles long enough to convince even the most hardcore apocalypse junkies that the LHC will not be their demise, that’s when we’ll start hearing about how
“It’s a government conspiracy! We’re all really dead and the government has planted our souls in machines on Mars to convince us otherwise!”
But that’s just my guess. Who knows, maybe people will actually admit that they were just being dumb.
Haha, I crack myself up.
Luckily, in the event we end up going the way of Alderaan, none of you will be around to say “I told you so,” so it’s a win-win for me.
August 8th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
I will say “I told you so” from heaven, I will yell it very loud so you can hear me from Hell (where you will be forever).
August 8th, 2008 at 9:48 pm
Shit, I hope the world doesn’t end this weekend. It would really put a damper on my birthday celebration for the entire Earth to be obliterated.
August 9th, 2008 at 2:05 am
“The first attempt to circulate a beam of particles around the tunnel will take place on 10 September, according to a Thursday statement by the LHC’s builders, the European Organization for Nuclear Research (Cern). This event will follow a long commissioning process that has seen the structure cooled down to 1.9° above absolute zero (-271°C).”
They must have decided to put it off a little while longer. Either that, or they gave the entire population of Switzerland cancer and needed an alibi.
Anyway, I knew they didn’t light that sucker today; I didn’t feel a disturbance… As if millions of voices cried out, then silence…
August 9th, 2008 at 2:11 am
You know, I scoured all of my usual news sources looking for that, because I thought I had seen something about a September start date, but didn’t find anything that looked valid. Oh well, I’d be lying if I said this post wasn’t a result of two glasses of wine and a sudden realization that I had a 45 minute deadline with nothing good to post.
So um…go Olympics?